


noize

by orphan_account



Category: Oasis (Band)
Genre: Angst, Gallaghercest, M/M, Sibling Incest, i left my last story on kind of a shitty note but like, i’m more enthusiastic about this one yknow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2018-12-09
Packaged: 2019-09-15 00:12:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16923039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: forgetting is difficult, covering the issue with another issue? that’s easy.





	1. Chapter 1

‘where we’re living in this town, the sun is coming up and it’s coming down

but it’s all just the same at the end of the day’ 

every time my feet touch the ground i feel something propelling me back up again. jumping, jumping, jumping and trying to forget about you like i usually do. the music isn’t great - average tunes that drone on the way most music does nowadays - but that doesn’t stop me from acting like it’s the best thing i’ve ever heard. the friend i’ve made tonight’s genuinely enjoying it though, the difference between me and him being that his smile actually means something rather than trying to pretend to himself he’s having fun.

it all stemmed from trying to improve my situation. you’re out there lifting gear and making something of yourself as i just kinda mill about taking drugs to empty my mind of that constant stream of ‘noel, noel, noel’ that i’ve gotten so sick of lately. upon realising that drugs cost a lot more if you’re not stealing them off your brother, i’ve tried to find better ways to think about other things or even better - not think at all.

one of the ways i’ve discovered is going to gigs with bands that i don’t really care about and just letting the music swallow me up. jumping til i can’t feel my feet anymore. another way, which i plan to indulge in after this, is going home with someone i don’t know and filling my mind with them instead. it’s better than going home alone and dreaming about what you’re doing now, or who you’re doing now and how much more mature then me they probably are, don’t get fucking obsessed with people that’d rather be a thousand miles away from you. and i know it’s a stupid thought because you tell me you care about me all the time, but i still worry that you’re gonna stumble upon someone better. you’re travelling the world for god’s sake, it’s not like it’s difficult to find someone that’s sweeter, softer and more positive than i am in our street, let alone the world.

with a shout of “this last one, then i’m getting off!” i let myself stand still and take in the music for what it is, a distraction. the friend i made earlier is still jumping, but stops when he sees me.

“you alright?” funny that he sounds concerned, i met him like, what, twenty minutes ago?

“yeah”

“d’you wanna get back?”

“yeah.”

and with that, we make our way outside. the street is cold even if i’m wearing the jacket you left here before you went off for a year, and he puts his arm around me. for some reason, i feel even colder.

“forgive me if i’m getting this wrong, but we’re going back to mine right?”

“yeah, let’s do that.”

and as we walk down quiet streets in complete silence, i realise how much i really do miss arguing with you. how much i miss everything about you, including your kisses, your songs and even your pushes as i stood in the way of something or other, trying to be funny, trying to start a conversation. i miss your fucking drugs too, and i’d like to say it’s because i could get them off you for free, but we both know it’s because there’s nothing better than getting high with your brother before he fucks you. no one else knows that though, no one has to know and if they did then it’d rip a giant fucking hole in our bubble that i’ve been trying to keep safe for months. 

maybe that’s why you left. maybe you didn’t want to be trapped in here with me anymore. again, a stupid thought. you care, i know that. i just need to remind myself of that more often.

i hear the jingling of keys and a faint voice asking me if i want a drink and as much as i wish i could describe anything that happened after that that night, the overconsumption of alcohol’s never been good for memory.

-

‘what we don’t see, well, it can’t be real

what we don’t touch we cannot feel.’

-

“when are you coming back?”

“i’ve still got about two months ‘til tour’s over.”

most of the time, two months wouldn’t really seem like a long time. two months until christmas, two months until new years, two months until any other event could never feel as long as two more months without you. 

i’d called you in a moment of weakness. covering my main issue of you not being here with more issues of being drunk all the time and going out with people i don’t really like wasn’t helping much recently, and i felt like i didn’t really have any other options to save my sanity.

“alright?”

“alright.”

“good.”

we sit in silence for a few seconds, both thinking about how incredibly not alright it really is.

“are you sure?” well, i wasn’t expecting that.

“of course i am.”

“you’re really not.”

“i think you’ll find i really am.”

“liam-“

“it’s honestly fine, noel. you don’t need to worry about me. it’s not like two months is that long, is it?” it is.

“well, i guess- if you’re sure it’s fine-“

“yes, i’m sure, it’ll be alright.”

“okay.”

“okay.”

“i’ll see you soon.”

“yeah.”

there’s silence, like we’re both waiting to say something but neither of us have the courage to. the silence is broken by the click the phone makes as i put it down.

as depressing as the conversation was, i feel better after talking to you. kinda makes me feel like i’m traveling the world with you rather than being stuck at home waiting like a wife for her husband when he’s on the front line. it’s a dramatic analogy but it’s a dramatic thing in the first place, for one of the people you care about to disappear for a year.

one day, we’re gonna tour the world together. i’ve got enough musical friends to form a hundred bands. i’ve tried singing and i feel like i’m good enough at it to at least go somewhere with it, and between us we have enough talent to do anything. all we really need is the courage to do something, and when you’re back i know that i’ll get my motivation back.

however, right now and for the next two months all i’m really interested in are my distractions and my bed, so i’ll think about that another day.

‘we can talk and find common ground, we can just forget about feeling down

we can just forget about life in this town.’


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> heaven knows i’m miserable now

“missed you, missed you, missed you-“ was all i could really say as you walked in the door. i held your body close to mine as if you were going to disintegrate at any moment and i had to make you a part of me to stop that from happening.

“i missed you too.”

‘i was happy in the haze of a drunken hour, but heaven knows i’m miserable now’

wake up, go out, get fucked up, sleep. that’s all it really was when you weren’t here. but now you are, so none of it matters anymore.

unpacking your stuff takes a long time but leads to me finding a lot of interesting things along the way. an orange jumper? i’ll be taking that, thank you very much. and that cash in the pocket of the jeans you told me it was my job to fold is going into my pockets too, consider it payment. you don’t seem to notice, seeming more preoccupied with folding the what, seventh polo shirt so far? it’s only when we’re both done that you say something.

“i really have missed you, y’know. m’not just saying that.”

“and i’ve really missed you too.”

and then you’re walking towards me, making me feel like a little fucking girl even though i’m two inches taller than you and you pull me into a kiss i’ve been starved for for the last twelve months. we only stop when i feel you smile.

“desperate, huh?” you say, smiling like you’re not the exact same way.

“you are, but what am i?” it’s a childish rebuttal, but you can’t really say you’re not after you’re the one who’s insinuated it. you only reply with a look that says enough and pull me back into a bruising kiss.

-

‘in my life, oh why do i give valuable time, to people who don’t care if i live or die?’

-

the bed in your flat still smells unmistakably like you, even if you haven’t been here for the last twelve months. you’re preparing me with your fingers now, and i can’t express how much i’ve missed this. i could fuck every girl on the planet, mess around with any boy, and no one would ever come close to you. i hope you feel the same about me.

i don’t want to ask if you’ve slept with anyone else because i’m almost certain you have, and i don’t really have the right to be upset seeing as i’m with someone new every saturday. it still hurts though, knowing that you’ve shown even a fraction of the affection you give to me to someone else, but i can’t really explain why. possessiveness, maybe. fear of being replaced, probably. i just hope to god that you haven’t fucked any guys whilst on the road, because for some reason that would hurt more. again, i can’t explain why.

as soon as you curl your fingers just the right way though, i forget about all that.

“fuck, noel, m’close-“

“hold on for me, baby.”

the name makes me feel like my veins are electric, and i know at an instant that i never want to be anyone else’s. just yours, for as long as you still want me.

i hear the cap of a bottle opening and closing again, and i don’t really have to open my eyes to know what’s coming next. i do anyway though, and i see your face contorting in pleasure as you enter me. in a hot rush, my body is filled with every sensation and emotion at once, and i close my eyes, choosing to get lost in the feeling of it all. 

you’re steady to begin with, quiet cursing under your breath as i’m being pretty loud myself. 

“fuck, please-“

“noel, i’m close”

that seems to set you off, your hips moving at an uneven pace and it’s all happening at once, ‘angel’ is one of the few things i actually hear in the heat of the moment, and i’m coming just seconds before you do.

there’s a moment of silence as i open my eyes and see you looking down at me. you’re smiling like you always do at this moment, and i could wish for nothing more but to be trapped in this moment with you forever.

eventually, you do move, but only to lay down beside me. we can clean up later, right now all that matters is that you’re here with me and i’m never gonna let you go again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m not really sure if i like this, sorry it’s taken so long to update. i’m working on other things right now so this is some sort of conclusion to the story, as i probably won’t be continuing it. thanks for reading !! <3

**Author's Note:**

> hey, i wrote another thing because i kinda left my other story on a weird note after i got a little stuck when trying to develop the plot any further than it is, so i’m leaving it as it is lmao. i have a good feeling about this though, and i’m going to try and continue the story. i’ll try to update as quick as i can, but probably not daily. thank you for reading !! <3


End file.
